9 Relaxation Skills
Recap
Practising breathing skills help us to feel more relaxed. The key skills are:
- Awareness of your breath
- Diaphragmatic breathing (belly breathing)
- Square breathing (or variations of this).
Practice 1: Being in the present moment
One of the main parts of being in the green zone is to be in the present moment. Difficult thoughts and feelings can often pull us away from the present moment and we get caught up in the whirlwind of them. This whirlwind of difficult thoughts and feelings might then influence the decisions you make and the things that you do. Being in the present moment means you are more in control of these decisions and can be guided by what is important to you instead.
There are lots of different strategies you can practise to help you be in the present moment. Here is an example - you can play the audio clip or follow the script below:
Find a comfortable, upright position, and either close your eyes or gently focus on a spot in front of you. Now take a deep breath to bring yourself into the ‘here and now’ [pause], just noticing whatever you are experiencing right now. Can you notice any sensations that you have, like discomfort or tension. Try to notice your feet on the ground, or, if you’re sitting, notice whatever you are sitting on; notice your clothes against your body and the air against the skin. [Pause five seconds.]
And now, notice whatever is in your mind. Whatever thoughts are here, and as best you can, just observe your thoughts as they are in your mind right now. [Pause.] Now notice whatever you are feeling emotionally. Don’t try to change it, but just notice how you are feeling. [Pause five seconds.]
And now, bring your attention to your breath, just noticing the rise and fall of your stomach as you breathe in [pause], and as you breathe out. [Pause five seconds.] Notice the cool air flowing in through your nose as you inhale and the warm air as you exhale [pause], as you breathe in and out. [Pause.]
If you find your mind getting distracted from your breath, that’s okay. Simply bring it back to noticing each breath in, and out, as they follow, one after the other. [Pause five seconds.]
Now bring your attention back to the room; open your eyes if they are closed. Notice what you can see; notice what you can hear. Push your feet into the ground and have a stretch; notice yourself stretching. Welcome back!
Choose a day and time when you can try practising this skill. Write this on your calendar or put it in your phone. When you have tried this skill, make some notes about what you experienced, how you felt, and any difficulties that you had (if any).
Practice 2: Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)
Fight, flight or freeze gets your muscles to react quickly to a threat. This can make your muscles feel very tight and tense when you are experiencing lots of threats, and therefore lots of fight, flight or freeze.
PMR guides you to tense and then relax your muscles one by one. If you feel able to, you can play the audio clip or follow the script below. Practise PMR during the day.
Find yourself a quiet place to relax. For this relaxation, you can either sit or lie down. Close your eyes if you feel comfortable to do so, or softly hold your gaze at a spot in the room you’re in. Let your hands rest loosely in your lap, or by your side. Become aware of your breathing, and notice how your belly rises and falls with each breath (Pause for 5 seconds).
Now take a long, slow, deep breath in through your nose, all the way down into your belly. Hold the breath for a moment, and then breathe out through your mouth. Take another slow breath in through your nose. Fill your lungs completely. Hold it for a moment… and breathe out through your mouth. Empty your lungs completely. Take a third deep breath in. Hold it for a moment, and then let it go. You might notice that the tension in your body has already started to loosen.
During this relaxation, you will be asked to tense different muscles in your body. Please do this without straining. Just tense each muscle firmly but gently as you breathe in. If you feel uncomfortable at any time, try to relax and breathe normally.
Bring your awareness to your feet and toes. Breathe in deeply through your nose, and as you do, gradually curl your toes down and tense the muscles in the soles of your feet. Hold your breath for just a few seconds and then relax the muscles in your feet as you breathe out. Feel the tension in your feet wash away as you breathe out. Notice how different your feet feel when tensed and when they are relaxed.
Take a deep breath in, and tense the muscles in your thighs. Hold for just a moment, and then release everything. As you do this, blood will flow to your muscles, and you may notice a warm tingling sensation.
Now bring your awareness to your stomach. Take in a nice deep breath and then tighten these muscles. Imagine you are trying to touch your belly button to your spine. Now let go of your breath and let your muscles relax. Notice the sensation of relief that comes from letting go.
Bring your awareness to the muscles in your back. As you slowly breathe in, arch your back slightly and tighten these muscles…. Now breathe out and let your muscles relax.
Now give your attention to your shoulder muscles and the muscles in your neck. As you slowly draw in a nice deep breath, pull your shoulders up towards your ears and squeeze these muscles firmly. Now breathe out completely, and allow your contracted muscles to go loose and limp.
Now it’s time to let go of all the tension in your arms and hands. Let’s start with your upper arms. As you breathe in, raise your wrists towards your shoulders and tighten the muscles in your upper arms. Hold that breath and that contraction for just a moment…and then gently lower your arms and breathe all the way out. You may feel a warm sensation in your muscles when you tighten them.
Continue to focus on your breathing for as long as you like. When you are ready, slowly open your eyes if they are closed and bring your attention back to the area around you. Welcome back!
Choose a day and time when you can try practising this skill. Write this on your calendar or put it in your phone. When you have tried this skill, make some notes about what you experienced, how you felt, and any difficulties that you had (if any).
Practice 3: Body Scan
A ‘body scan’ will bring your awareness to what areas of your body feel comfortable and what areas feel uncomfortable. Knowing what feels uncomfortable and tense is the first step to being able to relax these areas. If you feel able to, you can play the audio clip or follow the script below. Practise body scans at bedtime, as it can be helpful when you’re trying to get to sleep.
Find yourself a quiet place to relax. For this relaxation, you can either sit or lie down. Close your eyes if you feel comfortable to do so, or softly hold your gaze at a spot in the room you’re in. Let your shoulders drop down and away from your ears. Bring your attention to your breathing. Breathe in… and out… (Pause 5 seconds).
This exercise is to notice the different feelings in your body. It is not about whether these feelings are good or bad.
Take a deep breath in through your nose, filling your lungs with air and feeling your belly rise. Hold this for a moment. Breathe out through your mouth and empty your lungs, feeling your belly fall.
Scan your left foot for any sensations. Just become aware of them. (Pause) Then scan your lower left leg. Notice and allow any sensations that might be there. (Pause) Then scan your upper left leg. (Pause) If you don’t feel anything, that’s okay. If you do become aware of tension or any other uncomfortable feeling in a particular part of your body, see if you can breathe into it. To do this, take a breath in and bring your awareness to the sensation, without trying to change it.
Now scan your right foot (pause), lower right leg (pause), then upper right leg. (Pause) Just try to notice any sensations and feel what is happening. Try to bring a gentle curiosity to the sensations. (Pause)
If your mind has wandered and got distracted, this is completely normal. Gently notice this and bring your attention back to the body part you were focusing on.
Now focus on your belly. Feel it rising as you breathe in. Sinking as you breathe out. Your heart beat may get slower. This is normal. (Pause)
Now scan for any sensations in your left hand and arm. (Pause) Try to become aware of the different sensations and feel what is happening. Keep bringing an awareness and a curiosity to the sensations. Again, if you don’t feel anything at the moment, that’s okay.
Scan for any sensations in your right hand and arm. (Pause)
Then scan up along your neck and to your face. Feel the sensations in your jaw and your throat. (Pause)
Now bring your awareness to the top of your head. (Pause) Take a moment to notice how all of your body parts are connected.
Let any sensations just be. Just notice what kind of sensation it is – tingling, warmth, coolness, heaviness, floating. Try to accept whatever sensation there is. (Pause)
Continue to focus on your breathing for as long as you like. When you are ready, slowly open your eyes if they are closed and bring your attention back to the area around you. Welcome back!
Choose a day and time when you can try practising this skill. Write this on your calendar or put it in your phone. When you have tried this skill, make some notes about what you experienced, how you felt, and any difficulties that you had (if any).
Practice 4: The Five Senses
You can use this skill to bring you back to the present moment, particularly if you do not want to focus on what is going on internally in your body. For example, if focusing on what is going on in your body tends to trigger a seizure for you, try this skill instead of Progressive Muscle Relaxation and Body Scan.
What are 5 things that you can see? Look around you and notice 5 things that you hadn’t noticed before. Maybe a pattern on a wall, light reflecting from a surface, or a knick-knack in the corner of a room.
What are 4 things that you can feel? Maybe you can feel the pressure of your feet on the floor, your shirt resting on your shoulders, or the temperature of the air on your skin. Pick up an object and notice its texture.
What are 3 things that you can hear? Notice all the background sounds you had been filtering out, such as air-conditioning, birds chirping, or cars on a distant street.
What are 2 things that you can smell? Maybe you can smell flowers, coffee, or freshly cut grass. It doesn’t have to be a nice smell either.
What is 1 thing that you can taste? Pop a piece of gum in your mouth, sip a drink, eat a snack if you have one, or simply notice how your mouth tastes. ‘Taste’ the air to see how it feels on your tongue.
Choose a day and time when you can try practising this skill. Write this on your calendar or put it in your phone. When you have tried this skill, make some notes about what you experienced, how you felt, and any difficulties that you had (if any).
Practice 5: Smartphone Apps
The apps below have different types of relaxation and being in the present moment exercises that can help you feel more relaxed, spend more time in the green zone, get better sleep, and help you improve your productivity and focus. These apps can be downloaded for free but you can subscribe for full content access.
Knowledge Check
- PMR stands for progressive mind relaxation. TRUE or FALSE?
- Being in the present moment is a relaxation skill. TRUE or FALSE?
- Body scan is recommended for daytime and PMR is recommended for night-time. TRUE or FALSE?
- PMR stands for progressive mind relaxation. TRUE or FALSE?
FALSE, PMR stands for progressive muscle relaxation. It guides you to tense and relax each muscle one by one and keeps you more in the green zone.
- Being in the present moment is a relaxation skill. TRUE or FALSE?
TRUE, being in the present moment can help you break away from a whirlwind of difficult thoughts and feelings, like anxiety, and keeps you more in the green zone.
- Body scan is recommended for daytime and PMR is recommended for night-time. TRUE or FALSE?
FALSE, PMR is recommended for daytime and body scan is recommended for night-time. Body scan can relax you and help you to fall asleep.